Sleep Like a Baby…No, Really.

For several years now I’ve had serious misgivings about the mattress industry, and the type of bedding we use in the US.

I’ve never had a problem sleeping on the floor, or on a comfy couch, or outdoors.  In fact, I’ve usually found that I sleep much better on the floor than I do in most beds.  My favorite mattress ever was a cheapo discount mattress that was hard as a rock.

A few years ago, before I left Virginia, I bought myself a new mattress.  I figured I should have a nice bed to sleep in, so I paid out for a nice mattress, and a good platform frame.  After three months, the mattress had a huge sag in the middle.

I took it back, and they gave me a new one.  That was nice of them!

Six months later, that one was developing a sag as well.

Now, I don’t think I gain mass while I sleep, but I might.  My next mattress was out here in SF.  My girlfriend and I bought a California King.  It was GREAT!

Till my side turned into a saggy marshmallow.

When my girl and I split up, I realized what I’d done wrong.  I’d believed the hype!!!

I moved out of our old place, and left that old bed there.  I slept on the floor for a few weeks, but the floor by itself is rather unforgiving.  So off I went to the local futon shop.

They hooked me up!  For less than $200 they gave me a simple pine futon frame, and a nice, thick, firm futon mattress.  It feels like sleeping on a soft floor.  Very nice!

The other things I left behind were my pillows.  I’ve had a Chinese pillow full of flax husks for five or six years now.  Why not just use that as my pillow?!

It worked great.  Till last night, that is.

Last night, I slept without a pillow.

And I realized something.

Ever see a baby sleep, or see a picture of a sleeping baby?

It looks like this:

Awww!  Wook at da widdle bay-beeeee!

Awww! Wook at da widdle bay-beeeee!

or like this:

Sweepy

Sweepy

Notice anything?

THEY DON’T HAVE PILLOWS!

I felt very strange when I woke up and realized I hadn’t used a pillow all night.  But then I wondered, why had I used a pillow for so long?

And why do people spend hundreds or thousands of dollars on mattresses when my futon seemed to be doing the trick for less than $200?

I don’t know.  Do you?

More to Philosophical Babies

There are a few other things to share from Alison Gopnik’s book “The Philosophical Baby.”

For one, her account of babies’ idea/ability to work with time is fascinating. On page 153, she says “babies and young children don’t yet have autobiographical memory and executive control. They don’t experience their lives as a single timeline stretching back into the past and forward into the future…”

Apparently, this is an ability that we acquire through practice. What does that mean?!

And, “those programs [the Perry Preschool Project, and the Carolina Abecedarian Project - preschool projects that resulted in adults who were significantly more prosperous, healthier, and less likely to be jailed than their peers] didn’t just influence the children, they influenced their parents, too. These progams gave poor parents, as well as poor children, a sense of autonomy and connection. The children in these programs didn’t just have different early experiences, they had different parents, and they had those different parents for life…” pg. 177.

There is a very real problem with the “do it yourself” attitude that is being espoused in our country recently.

No one does anything by themselves.  In case you haven’t noticed, everyone is intimately connected in this world, and everything is intimately connected in existence.

The funny thing about the “drive to personal responsibility” that we see in recent government programs, 401k, corporate doctrines, etc., is driving people closer and closer together.  The “entitlement generation” isn’t leaving home till they’re in their mid-twenties.  The family stays together longer.  Lack of medical care is forcing the elderly to live with their children.  The family becomes a unit again.

While on the one hand it’s sad that it takes a lack of general support to the individual from the government or larger organizations to drive this type of change, on the other hand, it’s change for the better!

The Philosophical Baby

Just finished reading another book…”The Philosophical Baby,” by Alison Gopnik.  In all, I really enjoyed it!

Interestingly, Gopnik mentions how critical the child’s early environment is to their mental image of the world.  This goes hand in hand with my review of the book The Future of the Body.  Raised in a culture that believes in faith healing, esp, or telekinesis, a child would believe in and attempt to practice those abilities.

She discusses Bayesian statistics – the idea that we create probabilities of possibilities, since nothing is certain – and experiments that seem to show that children are interacting with the world in a statistical fashion.

Well, from the point of view of a psychologist who has spent her career doing statistical behavioral research on children, of course it looks as if they’re thinking statistically about the world.  But is it necessarily true?

The issue is that our definitions of things (babies are statistically solving causal relationships in the world) will define not only the things themselves, but how we are able to think about other things in our world.  Once we see through statistical glasses, everything looks like a statistic.

But it’s not.

The best example I can give is the one that Gopnik uses herself.  Say you have an experiment in which you test a medication on high blood pressure.  The group on the medication has a decrease in high blood pressure.  You assume that it must be the medication causing the decrease in high blood pressure.  Fine.

But then, someone else does an experiment in which they give both groups a pill, neither of which is medication, but they tell one group that they’re receiving the real medicine.  The group that received the “real” placebo sees a decrease in HBP.

What was the medicine?

What happens, I think, as we become “adult” is that we rely more and more on the “causal” relationships we’ve identified in the world around us.  We believe our own press…or do our own supply…however you want to look at it.  Life becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts.  Wherever you look, you find evidence for your beliefs.  Because it’s all you are capable of seeing.

I really liked this book.  It comes so close, throughout, to really showing how there is no true difference between children and adults – it just doesn’t quite get there.

For instance, the author frequently cites “habituation” studies of infants.  “Habituation” refers to the tendency for infants to become disinterested in repetitive stimuli.  That is, when the same thing happens over and over, you stop paying attention to it.  However, habituation isn’t unique to infants, or to children…it’s common in all animals, at all “stages” of life.  TV advertisers are very familiar with habituation.  They change their commercials frequently enough to have a consistent effect on you.  If they just played the same Coke commercial for five years, its effectiveness would be lost.

As a brief aside, it’s interesting to observe that habituation is a physical phenomenon.  Most of the studies done on habituation are “psychological” studies.  How long does it take till this person gets bored of xyz?  But the brain is a physical entity, and the mind is a product of that physical brain.  We can observe habituation in our bodies through exercise, or, say, caffeine.  Have a cup of coffee in the morning, and it spikes your adrenals.  Have a cup every morning for a year, and suddenly, it doesn’t have any effect at all.

All of the examples that Gopnik uses to illustrate how children’s minds operate really end up showing that, through culturally-crafted pruning of behavior, we become the self-fulfilling automatons of our culture.

While that statement is a little forceful, it isn’t too far from reality.

A great example of this shows up in the book, around the middle, where the author describes a researcher who was studying Mayan culture.  Mayan mothers begin teaching their children basic skills at a very very young age, and they are careful to make sure that the children are paying attention.  This particular researcher was stunned to find 18 month old babies wielding machetes against coconuts, without any concern from their mothers – just as amazed as the Mayan mothers were that the researcher’s young daughter could operate the sink and toilet in a modern bathroom without any supervision.

My biggest point of concern for what is not said in this book goes back to James Carse’s book “Finite and Infinite Games.”

I would say that the definition of “adult” in our US culture is – “one who plays only finite games.”  If you play infinite games, you are “childish.”

You can play many finite games at the same time, but they all must be finite.  For instance, you can simultaneously be Christian, a scientist, and an NRA member.  But, as Carse says, you must play, so you cannot play.

The thing I love is the thing I hate.  Alison Gopnik, through her exposition of psychological studies of infants and children (which necessarily draw a dividing line between them and adults), shows us the qualities that we, as adults, have given up…

That we can take up once again…