Turn Obligation into Choice

I have the tendency to think of things I ought to do, or ought to have done. But that way of looking at events is very passive.

Instead, I can choose to look at those things as choices.

For instance, if I think “I should have done xyz…,” which leaves me in a position of regret. I can re-tell that story as “I chose not to do xyz…”

At that point, I’ve changed the locus of control from the past (external) to myself (internal).

Relating to my past and future in this way not only “empowers” me, but also leads to more active decision-making.

I’m playing with this right now…definitely interested to hear other perspectives on this type of practice.

Trying to catch up with the past…

My client said this to me the other day.

Josh, he said, “I realized that I’ve been trying to catch up with the past.”

Wow, I thought. That’s deep.

The more I think about it, the deeper it gets.

How far down does the rabbit hole go?

How far down does the rabbit hole go?

First, I guess, you need to decide what this means for you.  For me, it means that there are places and things that I keep trying to get to that are based on ideas I had in the past.  They aren’t current.  It’s like trying to go someplace with a map of a different area.  Some of the streets have the same names.  You might get somewhere.  But you won’t get where you want to be, because you aren’t admitting where you really are.

Where in your life are you trying to catch up with the past?  Where are you doing things based on old ideas of yourself, or hopes or dreams you had years ago, instead of dealing with yourself in the present moment?

Once I started to think about it this way, a lot of things came up for me.  I’m still trying to learn this lesson – to drop old ideas and start from right here, right now.

add to del.icio.us :: Add to Blinkslist :: add to furl :: Digg it :: add to ma.gnolia :: Stumble It! :: add to simpy :: seed the vine :: :: :: TailRank :: post to facebook